The acclaimed Science of Discworld centred around an original Pratchett story about the Wizards of Discworld. In it they accidentally witnessed the creation and evolution of our universe, a plot which was interleaved with a Cohen & Stewart non-fiction narrative about Big Science. In The Science of Discworld II our authors join forces again to see just what happens when the wizards meddle with history in a battle against the elves for the future of humanity on Earth. London is replaced by a dozy Neanderthal village. The Renaissance is given a push. The role of fat women in art is developed. And one very famous playwright gets born and writes The Play. Weaving together a fast-paced Discworld novelette with cutting-edge scientific commentary on the evolution and development of the human mind, culture, language, art, and science, this is a book in which 'the hard science is as gripping as the fiction'. ( The Times )

Roundworld is in trouble again, and this time it looks fatal. Having created it in the first place, the wizards of Unseen Univeristy feel vaguely responsible for its safety. They know the creatures who lived there escaped the impending Big Freeze by inventing the space elevator - they even intervened to rid the planet of a plague of elves, who attempted to divert humanity onto a different time track. But now it's all gone wrong - Victorian England has stagnated and the pace of progress would embarrass a limping snail. Unless something drastic is done, there won't be time for anyone to invent spaceflight and the human race will be turned into ice-pops.

Why, though, did history come adrift? Was it Sir Arthur Nightingale's dismal book about natural selection? Or was it the devastating response by an obscure country vicar called Charles Darwin, whose bestselling Theology of Species made it impossible to refute the divine design of living creatures? Either way, it's no easy task to change history, as the wizards discover to their cost. Can the God of Evolution come to humanity's aid and ensure Darwin writes a very different book? And who stopped him writing it in the first place?

The fourth book in the Science of Discworld series, and this time around dealing with THE REALLY BIG QUESTIONS, Terry Pratchett’s brilliant new Discworld story Judgement Day is annotated with very big footnotes (the interleaving chapters) by mathematician Ian Stewart and biologist Jack Cohen, to bring you a mind-mangling combination of fiction, cutting-edge science and philosophy.

Marjorie Daw is a librarian, and takes her job – and indeed the truth of words – very seriously. She doesn’t know it, but her world and ours – Roundworld – is in big trouble. On Discworld, a colossal row is brewing…

The Wizards of Unseen University feel responsible for Roundworld (as one would for a pet gerbil). After all, they brought it into existence by bungling an experiment in Quantum ThaumoDynamics. But legal action is being brought against them by Omnians, who say that the Wizards’ god-like actions make a mockery of their noble religion.

As the finest legal brains in Discworld (a zombie and a priest) gird their loins to do battle – and when the Great Big Thing in the High Energy Magic Laboratory is switched on – Marjorie Daw finds herself thrown across the multiverse and right in the middle of the whole explosive affair.

As God, the Universe and, frankly, Everything Else is investigated by the trio, you can expect world-bearing elephants, quantum gravity in the Escher-verse, evolutionary design, eternal inflation, dark matter, disbelief systems – and an in-depth study of how to invent a better mousetrap.

It's murder in Discworld! -- which ordinarily is no big deal. But what bothers Watch Commander Sir Sam Vimes is that the unusual deaths of three elderly Ankh-Morporkians do not bear the clean, efficient marks of the Assassins' Guild. An apparent lack of any motive is also quitetroubling. All Vimes has are some tracks of white clay and more of those bothersome "clue" things that only serve to muck up an investigation. The anger of a fearful populace is already being dangerously channeled toward the city's small community of golems -- the mindless, absurdlyindustrious creatures of baked clay who can occasionally be found toiling in the city's factories. And certain highly placed personages are using the unrest as an excuse to resurrect a monarchy -- which would be bad enough even if the "king" they were grooming wasn't as empty-headed as your typical animated pottery.

"Of all the cities in the world it could have flown into, it flew into mine. . "

Some night-time prowler is turning the citizens of Ankh-Morpork, greatest city of the fantasy Discworld*, into something resembling small charcoal biscuits.

And that's a real problem for Captain Vimes of the City Watch, who must tramp the mean streets of the city searching for a seventy-foot-long fire-breathing dragon which, he believes, can help him with their enquiries.

In a city thrown into turmoil by magic, charcoal biscuits, secret societies and mad lady dragon breeders ("Just tell him 'sit' if he'sothering you"), he's just looking for the facts.

* Which is flat and rides through space on the back of four elephants who stand on the shell of an enormous turtle, as every scholar knows.

Cameras roll - which means the imps inside have to paint really fast - in the fantastic Discworld when the alchemists discover the magic of the silver screen.

But what is the dark secret of Holy Wood hill?
As the alien clich's of Tinsel Town pour into the world, it's up to the Disc's first film stars to find out...
THRILL as Victor Tugelbend ("Can't sing. Can't dance. Can handle a sword a little") and Theda Withel ("I come from a little town you've probably never even heard of") battle the forces of evil and cinema advertising...

SCREAM as Gaspode the Wonder Dog nearly saves the day...
EAT POPCORN as you watch the filming of "Blown Away", the oddest Civil War picture ever made...
A Passionate Saga Set Against the Background of a World Gone Mad!
This Will Amaze You!
With a Thousand Elephants!

("And afterwards, why not dine at Harga's House of Ribs, for the best in international cuisine; only two minutes from this book...")

"Pratchett's humor is international, satirical, devious, knowing, irreverent, unsparing, and above all, funny.

" —Kirkus Reviews In this ninth installment of the Discworld series from internationally renowned and bestselling author Sir Terry Pratchett, Eric was hoping for a wish-granting demon. What he got was the Discworld's most incompetent wizard.

Discworld's only demonology hacker, Eric, is about to make life very difficult for the rest of Ankh-Morpork's denizens. This would-be Faust is very bad ... at his work, that is. All he wants is to fulfill three little wishes: to live forever, to be master of the universe, and to have a stylin' hot babe.

But Eric isn't even good at getting his own way. Instead of a powerful demon, he conjures, well, Rincewind, a wizard whose incompetence is matched only by Eric's. And as if that wasn't bad enough, that lovable travel accessory the Luggage has arrived, too. Accompanied by his new best friends, there's only one thing Eric wishes now—that he'd never been born!

They say there are only two things you can count on. But that was before Death started pondering the existential. Of course,the last thing anyone needs is a squeamish Grim Reaper and soon his Discworld bosses have sent him off with best wishes anda well-earned gold watch. Now Deathis having the time of his life, findinggreener pastures where he can put hisscythe to a whole new use.

But like every cutback in an importantpublic service, Death's demise soon leads to chaos and unrest—literally, for those whose time was supposed to be up, like Windle Poons. The oldest geezer in the entire faculty of Unseen University—home of magic, wizardry, and big dinners—Windle was looking forward to a wonderful afterlife,not this boring been-there-done-that routine. To get the fresh start he deserves,Windle and the rest of Ankh-Morpork's undead and underemployed set off to find Death and save the world for the living(and everybody else, of course).

Although they may feature witches and wizards, vampires and dwarves, along with the occasional odd human, Terry Pratchett's bestselling Discworld novels are grounded firmly in the modern world. Taking humorous aim at all our foibles, each novel reveals our true character and nature. It's a dreamy midsummer's night in the Kingdom of Lancre. But music and romance aren't the only things filling the air. Magic and mischief are afoot, threatening to spoil the royal wedding of King Verence and his favorite witch, Magrat Garlick. Invaded by some Fairie Trash, soon it won't be only champagne that's flowing through the streets ...

Be careful what you wish for...Once upon a time there was a fairy godmother named Desiderata who had a good heart, a wise head, and poor planning skills—which unforunately left the Princess Emberella in the care of her other (not quite so good and wise) godmother when DEATH came for Desiderata. So now it's up to Magrat Garlick, Granny Weatherwax, and Nanny Ogg to hop on broomsticks and make for far-distant Genua to ensure the servant girl doesn't marry the Prince.

But the road to Genua is bumpy, and along the way the trio of witches encounters the occasional vampire, werewolf, and falling house (well this is a fairy tale, after all). The trouble really begins once these reluctant foster-godmothers arrive in Genua and must outwit their power-hungry counterpart who'll stop at nothing to achieve a proper "happy ending"—even if it means destroying a kingdom.

The thirteenth novel in the Discworld series from New York Times bestselling author Terry Pratchett.

Lost in the chill deeps of space between the galaxies, it sails on forever, a flat, circular world carried on the back of a giant turtle— Discworld —a land where the unexpected can be expected. Where the strangest things happen to the nicest people. Like Brutha, a simple lad who only wants to tend his melon patch. Until one day he hears the voice of a god calling his name. A small god, to be sure. But bossy as Hell.

A Young Dwarf's Dream

Corporal Carrot has been promoted! He's now in charge of the new recruits guarding Ankh-Morpork, Discworld's greatest city, from Barbarian Tribes, Miscellaneous Marauders, unlicensed Thieves, and such. It's a big job, particularly for an adopted dwarf.

But an even bigger job awaits. An ancient document has just revealed that Ankh-Morpork, ruled for decades by Disorganized crime, has a secret sovereign! And his name is Carrott...

And so begins the most awesome epic encounter of all time, or at least all afternoon, in which the fate of a city—indeed of the universe itself!—depends on a young man's courage, an ancient sword's magic, and a three-legged poodle's bladder.

Once, in a gods-forsaken hellhole called Koom Valley, trolls and dwarfs met in bloody combat. Centuries later, each species still views the other with simmering animosity. Lately, the influential dwarf, Grag Hamcrusher, has been fomenting unrest among Ankh-Morpork's more diminutive citizens—a volatile situation made far worse when the pint-size provocateur is discovered bashed to death ... with a troll club lying conveniently nearby.

Commander Sam Vimes of the City Watch is aware of the importance of solving the Hamcrusher homicide without delay. (Vimes's second most-pressing responsibility, in fact, next to always being home at six p.m. sharp to read Where's My Cow? to Sam, Jr.) But more than one corpse is waiting for Vimes in the eerie, summoning darkness of a labyrinthine mine network being secretly excavated beneath Ankh-Morpork's streets. And the deadly puzzle is pulling him deep into the muck and mire of superstition, hatred, and fear—and perhaps all the way to Koom Valley itself.

**

When her dear old Granddad -- the Grim Reaperhimself -- goes missing, Susan takes over the family business. The progeny of Death's adopted daughter and his apprentice, she shows real talent for the trade. That is until a little string in her heart goes "twang."

With a head full of dreams and a pocketful of lint,Imp the Bard lands in Ankh-Morpork, yearning to become a rock star. Determined to devote his life to music, the unlucky fellow soon finds that all his dreams are coming true. Well almost.

In this finger-snapping, toe-tapping tale of youth,Death, and rocks that roll, Terry Pratchett once again demonstrates the wit and genius that have propelled him to the highest echelons of parody next to Mark Twain, Kurt Vonnegut, Douglas Adams, and Carl Hiaasen.

"May you live in interesting times" is the worst thing one can wish on a citizen of Discworld -- especially on the distinctly unmagical sorcerer Rincewind, who has had far too much perilous excitement in his life. But when a request for a "Great Wizzard" arrives in Ankh-Morpork via carrier albatross from the faraway Counterweight Continent, it's he who's sent as emissary. Chaos threatens to follow the impending demise of the Agatean Empire's current ruler. And, for some incomprehensible reason, someone believes Rincewind will have a mythic role in the war and wholesale bloodletting that will surely ensue. (Carnage is pretty much a given, since Cohen the Barbarian and his extremely elderly Silver Horde are busily formulating their own plan for looting, pillaging, and, er, looking wistfully at girls.) However, Rincewind firmly believes there are too many heroes already in the world, yet only one Rincewind. And he owes it to the world to keep that one alive for as long as possible.

The Ghost in the bone-white mask who haunts theAnkh-Morpork Opera House was always considered a benign presence -- some would even say lucky -- until he started killing people. The sudden rash of bizarre backstage deaths now threatens to mar the operatic debut of country girl Perdita X. (nee Agnes) Nitt, she of the ample body and ampler voice.

Perdita's expected to hide in the chorus and sing arias out loud while a more petitely presentable soprano mouths the notes. But at least it's an escape from scheming Nanny Ogg and old Granny Weatherwax back home, who want her to join their witchy ranks.

Once Granny sets her mind on something, however, it's difficult -- and often hazardous -- to dissuade her. And no opera-prowling phantom fiend is going to keep a pair of determined hags down on the farm after they've seen Ankh-Morpork.

It’s the most wonderful time of the year, Hogswatchnight, when the Hogfather himself dons his red suit and climbs in his sleigh pulled by—of course—eight hogs, to shower gifts across Discworld. But when the fat man goes missing, someone has to sit in. It’s up to Death to take up the reigns—otherwise the sun won’t shine tomorrow ... or ever again.

Who would want to harm Discworld's most beloved icon? Very few things are held sacred in this twisted, corrupt, heartless—and oddly familiar—universe, but the Hogfather is one of them. Yet here it is, Hogswatchnight, that most joyous and acquisitive of times, and the jolly, old, red-suited gift-giver has vanished without a trace. And there's something shady going on involving an uncommonly psychotic member of the Assassins' Guild and certain representatives of Ankh-Morpork's rather extensive criminal element. Suddenly Discworld's entire myth system is unraveling at an alarming rate. Drastic measures must be taken, which is why Death himself is taking up the reins of the fat man's vacated sleigh ... which, in turn, has Death's level-headed granddaughter, Susan, racing to unravel the nasty, humbuggian mess before the holiday season goes straight to hell and takes everyone along with it.

For use in schools and libraries only. In the latest installment of the Discworld saga, a mysterious island rises out of the sea that everyone wants to claim, and as a battle rages between the Ankh-Morpork and the Al-Khali, the Ankh-Morpork turn to the brilliant Leonard of Quirm, who is more than happy to design the ultimate weapon for war.

Unthinkingly inviting Uberwald's undead, the Magpyrs, into Lancre to celebrate the birth of his daughter, King Verence makes a big mistake. Really big. Because once they're ensconced within the castle, these wine-drinking, garlic-eating, sun-loving modern vampires have no intention of leaving. Ever. And only an uneasy alliance between a nervous young priest and the argumentative local witches can save the country from being taken over by people with a cultivated bloodlust and bad taste in silk waistcoats. As the Lancre living are about to discover, there's only one way to fight. Go for the throat, or as the vampyres themselves say ... carpe jugulum!

On the Discworld’s last continent, it’s hot. It’s dry... very dry. There was this thing once called the Wet, which no one now believes in. Practically everything that’s not poisonous is venomous. But it’s the best bloody place in the world, all right? And it’ll die in a few days, except... Who is this hero striding across the red desert? Champion sheep shearer, horse rider, road warrior, beer drinker. A man in a hat, whose Luggage follows him on little legs, Yes ... all this place has between itself and wind-blown doom is Rincewind, the inept wizard. He’s the only hero left. Still ... no worries, eh? From the Trade Paperback edition.

Everyone knows that the world is flat, and supported on the backs of four elephants. But weren't there supposed to be five? Indeed there were. So where is it?...

When duty calls. Commander Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork constabulary answers. Even when he doesn't want to. He's been "invited" to attend a royal function as both detective and diplomat. The one role he relishes; the other requires, well, ruby tights. Of course where cops (even those clad in tights) go, alas, crime follows. An attempted assassination and a theft soon lead to a desperate chase from the low halls of Discworld royalty to the legendary fat mines of Uberwald, where lard is found in underground seams along with tusks and teeth and other precious ivory artifacts. It's up to the dauntless Vimes -- bothered as usual by a familiar cast of Discworld inhabitants (you know, trolls, dwarfs, werewolves, vampires and such) -- to solve the puzzle of the missing pachyderm. Which of course he does. After all, solving mysteries is his job.

Here we go again! In the newest appealing installment of the Discworld series, Pratchett (The Truth) takes on religion, time and... kung-fu movies? The cast includes Death; Miss Susan, Death's granddaughter; Jeremy Clockson, a clockmaker; Lobsang, a novice monk; and Lu-Tze, a sweeper at the temple of the History Monks. When a mysterious lady asks Jeremy to make a clock that is perfectly timed (even to the last tick), trouble begins it seems that such a clock would have the power to stop time completely. There would be no yesterday, no tomorrow, no next minute; in fact, everything and everyone would stop in its tracks. It's up to Miss Susan, Lobsang and Lu-Tze to figure out who in the end has decided to build the dangerous clock and how to stop him before the world crashes to a halt. Along the way we learn Rule One: "Do not act incautiously when confronting a little bald wrinkly smiling man," which is a very good lesson to learn. We also find out that Lobsang has more in store for his future than to be an apprentice monk. The story includes a quick nod to James Bond flicks with Qu, the monk who supplies gadgets to Lu-Tze and Lobsang, and at the end of Time the four (no, make that five) horsemen of the Apocalypse get to ride out for a jaunt. You don't need to catch all the in-jokes to enjoy the fun. Agent, Ralph Vincinanza. 6-city author tour.

The denizens of Ankh-Morpork fancy they've seen just about everything. But then comes the Ankh-Morpork Times, struggling scribe William de Worde's upper-crust, newsletter turned Discworld's first paper of record.

An ethical joulnalist, de Worde has a proclivity for investigating stories -- a nasty habit that soon creates powerful enemies eager to stop his presses. And what better way than to start the Inquirer, a titillating (well, what else would it be?) tabloid that conveniently interchanges what's real for what sells.

But de Worde's got an inside line on the hot story concerning Ankh-Morpork's leading patrician Lord Vetinari. The facts say Vetinari is guilty. But as William de Worde learns, facts don't always tell the whole story. There's that pesky little thing called the truth ...

Cohen the Barbarian.

He's been a legend in his own lifetime.

He can remember the good old days of high adventure, when being a Hero meant one didn't have to worry about aching backs and lawyers and civilization.

But these days, he can't always remember just where he put his teeth...

So now, with his ancient (yet still trusty) sword and new walking stick in hand, Cohen gathers a group of his old -- very old -- friends to embark on one final quest. He's going to climb the highest mountain of Discworld and meet the gods.

It's time the Last Hero in the world returns what the first hero stole. Trouble is, that'll mean the end of the world, if no one stops him in time.

*The book that inspired the big-hit new film starring Emilia Clarke, Himesh Patel, David Tennant, Hugh Laurie and Joe Sugg, coming 16th December. Read before you see! With amazing content, from scripts to film art*Even wizards produce leftovers.

But a wizard's rubbish is laced with magic, and for the rats that forage this rubbish, the magic has changed them - they can speak and read, and have rather grand ambitions for a comfortable retirement.

Which is perfect for a con-cat like Maurice. He has his own magical talents, and wants to get rich quick. Together with the rats, and young Keith, the 'piper', they work the towns to create their very own plague of rats - then lure them away for cash.

But in the run-down town Bad Blintz, this little con goes wrong, and suddenly these educated rodents aren't playing to the piper's tune ...'An astonishing novel' Financial Times

A freak accident hurls Commander Sam Vines back into his own past, where he must assume a new identity and watch his younger self struggle to rise in the ranks of the City Watch of Ankh-Morpork while tracking down a dangerous criminal and finding a way to return to his own time. The 28th addition to Pratchett's "Discworld" series explores time travel and historical inevitability with cleverness and humor. The author's talent for comedy does not falter as he continues to set the standard for comic fantasy. A good choice, particularly where the series is popular.

The first in a series of Discworld novels starring the young witch Tiffany Aching.

A nightmarish danger threatens from the other side of reality....

Armed with only a frying pan and her common sense, young witch-to-be Tiffany Aching must defend her home against the monsters of Fairyland. Luckily she has some very unusual help: the local Nac Mac Feegle—aka the Wee Free Men—a clan of fierce, sheep-stealing, sword-wielding, six-inch-high blue men.

Together they must face headless horsemen, ferocious grimhounds, terrifying dreams come true, and ultimately the sinister Queen of the Elves herself....

Eleven-year-old Tiffany Aching wants to be a real witch. But a real witch doesn't casually step out of her body, leaving it empty. Tiffany does - and there's something just waiting for a handy body to take over. Something ancient and horrible, which can't die. Now Tiffany's got to learn to be a real witch quickly, with the help of arch-witch Mistress Weatherwax, the truly amazing Miss Level. And the Nac Mac Feegle - the rowdiest, toughest, smelliest bunch of fairies ever to be thrown out of Fairyland for being drunk at two in the afternoon. They'll fight anything...

War has come to Discworld ... again. And, to no one's great surprise, the conflict centers around the small, arrogantly fundamentalist duchy of Borogravia, which has long prided itself on its unrelenting aggressiveness. A year ago, Polly Perks's brother marched off to battle, and Polly's willing to resort to drastic measures to find him. So she cuts off her hair, dons masculine garb, and -- aided by a well-placed pair of socks -- sets out to join this man's army. Since a nation in such dire need of cannon fodder can't afford to be too picky, Polly is eagerly welcomed into the fighting fold—along with a vampire, a troll, an Igor, a religious fanatic, and two uncommonly close "friends.

" It would appear that Polly "Ozzer" Perks isn't the only grunt with a secret. But duty calls, the battlefield beckons. And now is the time for all good ... er ... "men" to come to the aid of their country.

The seventh book in the award-winning comic fantasy Discworld series by Terry Pratchett.

Unlike most teenaged boys, Teppic isn't chasing girls and working at the mall. Instead he's just inherited the throne of the desert kingdom Djelibeybi—a job that's come a bit earlier than he expected (a turn of fate his recently departed father wasn't too happy about either).

It's bad enough being new on the job, but Teppic hasn't a clue as to what a pharaoh is supposed to do. After all, he's been trained at Ankh-Morpork's famed assassins' school, across the sea from the Kingdom of the Sun. First, there's the monumental task of building a suitable resting place for Dad—a pyramid to end all pyramids. Then there are the myriad administrative duties, such as dealing with mad priests, sacred crocodiles, and marching mummies. And to top it all off, the adolescent pharaoh discovers deceit and betrayal—not to mention a headstrong handmaiden—at the heart of his realm.

Sometimes being a god is no fun at all....

Convicted con man and forger Moist von Lipwig is given a choice: Face the hangman’s noose, or get Ankh Morpork’s ancient Post Office up and running efficiently!

It was a tough decision ...

Now, the former criminal is facing really big problems. There’s tons of undelivered mail. Ghosts are talking to him. One of the postmen is 18,000 years old. And you really wouldn’t want to know what his new girlfriend can do with a shoe.

To top it all off, shadowy characters don’t want the mail moved. Instead, they want him dead—deader than all those dead letters. (And here he’d thought that all he’d have to face was rain, snow, and gloom of night ...)

The Ankh-Morpork Post Office is running like ... well, not at all like a government office. The mail is delivered promptly; meetings start and end on time; five out of six letters relegated to the Blind Letter Office ultimately wend their way to the correct addresses. Postmaster General Moist von Lipwig, former arch-swindler and confidence man, has exceeded all expectations—including his own. So it's somewhat disconcerting when Lord Vetinari summons Moist to the palace and asks, "Tell me, Mr. Lipwig, would you like to make some real money?"Vetinari isn't talking about wages, of course. He's referring, rather, to the Royal Mint of Ankh-Morpork, a venerable institution that haas run for centuries on the hereditary employment of the Men of the Sheds and their loyal outworkers, who do make money in their spare time. Unfortunately, it costs more than a penny to make a penny, so the whole process seems somewhat counterintuitive.

Next door, at the Royal Bank, the Glooper, an "analogy machine," has scientifically established that one never has quite as much money at the end of the week as one thinks one should, and the bank's chairman, one elderly Topsy (née Turvy) Lavish, keeps two loaded crossbows at her desk. Oh, and the chief clerk is probably a vampire.

But before Moist has time to fully consider Vetinari's question, fate answers it for him. Now he's not only making money, but enemies too; he's got to spring a prisoner from jail, break into his own bank vault, stop the new manager from licking his face, and, above all, find out where all the gold has gone—otherwise, his life in banking, while very exciting, is going to be really, really short....

Tiffany Aching is a trainee witch — now working for the seriously scary Miss Treason. But when Tiffany witnesses the Dark Dance — the crossover from summer to winter — she does what no one has ever done before and leaps into the dance. Into the oldest story there ever is. And draws the attention of the wintersmith himself.

As Tiffany-shaped snowflakes hammer down on the land, can Tiffany deal with the consequences of her actions? Even with the help of Granny Weatherwax and the Nac Mac Feegle — the fightin’, thievin’ pictsies who are prepared to lay down their lives for their “big wee hag.”Wintersmith is the third title in an exuberant series crackling with energy and humour. It follows The Wee Free Men.

The wizards at Ankh-Morpork's Unseen University are renowned for many things—wisdom, magic, and their love of teatime—but athletics is most assuredly not on the list. And so when Lord Ventinari, the city's benevolent tyrant, strongly suggests to Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully that the university revive an erstwhile tradition and once again put forth a football team composed of faculty, students, and staff, the wizards of UU find themselves in a quandary. To begin with, they have to figure out just what it is that makes this sport—soccer with a bit of rugby thrown in—so popular with Ankh-Morporkians of all ages and social strata. Then they have to learn how to play it. Oh, and on top of that, they must win a football match without using magic. Meanwhile, Trev (a handsome street urchin and a right good kicker) falls hard for kitchen maid Juliet (beautiful, dim, and perhaps the greatest fashion model there ever was), and Juliet's best pal, UU night cook Glenda (homely, sensible, and a baker of jolly good pies) befriends the mysterious Mr. Nutt (about whom no one knows very much, including Mr. Nutt, which is worrisome ...). As the big match approaches, these four lives are entangled and changed forever. Because the thing about football—the most important thing about football­—is that it is never just about football.

It starts with whispers. Then someone picks up a stone. Finally, the fires begin.

When people turn on witches, the innocents suffer.... Tiffany Aching has spent years studying with senior witches, and now she is on her own. As the witch of the Chalk, she performs the bits of witchcraft that aren’t sparkly, aren’t fun, don’t involve any kind of wand, and that people seldom ever hear about: She does the unglamorous work of caring for the needy. But someone—or something—is igniting fear, inculcating dark thoughts and angry murmurs against witches. Aided by her tiny blue allies, the Wee Free Men, Tiffany must find the source of this unrest and defeat the evil at its root—before it takes her life. Because if Tiffany falls, the whole Chalk falls with her. Chilling drama combines with laughout-loud humor and searing insight as beloved and bestselling author Terry Pratchett tells the high-stakes story of a young witch who stands in the gap between good and evil.

'THE JURISDICTION OF A GOOD MAN EXTENDS TO THE END OF THE WORLD.'Commander Sam Vimes of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch is having some time off. Apparently.

But crime doesn't take a break - it's a truth universally acknowledged that a policeman on holiday would barely have time to open his suitcase before he finds his first corpse.

In the seemingly peaceful countryside, Vimes discovers much more than a body in the wardrobe. For the local nobles are hiding a deep, dark secret. There are many, many bodies - and an ancient atrocity more terrible than murder.

Vimes is out of his jurisdiction, out of his depth and out of his mind. But never out of ideas. Where there is a crime there must be a punishment.

They say that in the end all sins are forgiven. This might be the exception ...'As effortlessly, generously funny as only Pratchett can be, Snuff doesn't stint on laying bare the darker side of life either' Sunday TimesSnuff is the eighth book in the City Watch series, but you can read the Discworld novels in any order.

'The world lives between those who say it cannot be done and those who say that it can ... it's just a matter of thinking creatively.'Moist von Lipwig is a con man turned civil servant. As head of the Royal Bank and Post Office of Ankh-Morpork, he doesn't really want or need another job. But when the Patrician Lord Vetinari gives you a task, you do it or suffer the consequences. In Moist's case, death.

A brand-new invention has come to the city: a steam locomotive named Iron Girder, to be precise. With the railway's introduction and rapid expansion, Vetinari enlists Moist to represent the government and keep things on track.

But as with all new technology, some people have objections, and Moist will have to use every trick in his arsenal to keep the trains running ...'The most serious of comedies, the most relevant and real of fantasies' IndependentRaising Steam is the third and final book in the Moist von Lipwig series, but the Discworld novels can be read in any order.

This ebook edition includes an exclusive commentary on the Witches of Discworld, written by Jacqueline Simpson, co-author of The Folklore of Discworld.

A SHIVERING OF WORLDSDeep in the Chalk, something is stirring. The owls and the foxes can sense it, and Tiffany Aching feels it in her boots. An old enemy is gathering strength.

This is a time of endings and beginnings, old friends and new, a blurring of edges and a shifting of power. Now Tiffany stands between the light and the dark, the good and the bad. As the fairy horde prepares for invasion, Tiffany must summon all the witches to stand with her. To protect the land. Her land.

There will be a reckoning ...THE FINAL DISCWORLD NOVEL

Twoflower was a tourist, the first ever seen on the discworld. Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant idiot.' Somewhere on the frontier between thought and reality exists the Discworld, a parallel time and place which might sound and smell very much like our own, but which looks completely different. Certainly it refuses to succumb to the quaint notion that universes are ruled by pure logic and the harmony of numbers. But just because the Disc is different doesn't mean that some things don't stay the same. Its very existence is about to be threatened by a strange new blight: the arrival of the first tourist, upon whose survival rests the peace and prosperity of the land. But if the person charged with maintaining that survival in the face of robbers, mercenaries and, well, Death, is a spectacularly inept wizard, a little logic might turn out to be a very good idea...

'Panic?' said Rincewind hopefully. He always held that panic was the best means of survival.

When the very fabric of time and space are about to be put through the wringer - in this instance by the imminent arrival of a very large and determinedly oncoming meteorite - circumstances require a very particular type of hero. Sadly what the situation does not need is a singularly inept wizard, still recovering from the trauma of falling off the edge of the world. Equally it does not need one well-meaning tourist and his luggage which has a mind of its own. Which is a shame because that's all there is...

Terry Pratchett’s fantasy classic Wyrd Sisters, a novel in the bestselling Discworld series, is the story of Granny Weatherwax, the most highly regarded non-leader a coven of non-social witches could ever have.

Generally, these loners don't get involved in anything, mush less royal intrigue. but then there are those times they can't help it. As Granny Weatherwax is about to discover, though, it's a lot harder to stir up trouble in the castle than some theatrical types would have you think. Even when you've got a few unexpected spells up your sleeve.

Granny Weatherwax teams with two other witches—Nanny Ogg and Margat Garlick—as an unlikely alliance to save a prince and restore him to the throne of Lancre, in a tale that borrows—or is it parodies—some of William Shakespeare's best-loved works.

Terry Pratchett's profoundly irreverent novels, consistent number one bestsellers in England, have garnered him a revered position in the halls of parody along with Mark Twain, Kurt Vonnegut, Douglas Adams, and Carl Hiaasen.

In Equal Rites, a dying wizard tries to pass on his powers to an eighth son of an eighth son, who is just at that moment being born. The fact that the son is actually a daughter is discovered just a little too late...

Death comes to everyone eventually on Discworld. And now he's come to Mort with an offer the young man can't refuse. (No, literally, can't refuse since being dead isn't exactly compulsory.) Actually, it's a pretty good deal. As Death's apprentice, Mort will have free board and lodging. He'll get use of the company horse. And he won't have to take any time off for family funerals. But despite the obvious perks, young Mort is about to discover that there is a serious downside to working for the Reaper Man ... because this perfect job can be a killer on one's love life.

Terry Pratchett's profoundly irreverent, bestselling novels have garnered him a revered position in the halls of parody next to the likes of Mark Twain, Kurt Vonnegut, Douglas Adams, and Carl Hiaasen.

Sourcery , a hilarious mix of magic, mayhem, and Luggage, is the fifth book in Terry Pratchett's classic fantasy Discworld series.

Rincewind, the legendarily inept wizard, has returned after falling off the edge of the world. And this time, he’s brought the Luggage. But that’s not all… Once upon a time, there was an eighth son of an eighth son who was, of course, a wizard. As if that wasn’t complicated enough, said wizard then had seven sons. And then he had an eighth son — a wizard squared (that’s all the math, really). Who of course, was a source of magic — a sourcerer.

Will the sourcerer lead the wizards to dominate all of Discworld? Or can Rincewind’s tiny band stave off the Apocalypse?

An invaluable guide on how to "lighten up" from a distinguished pro who has provided laughs for JAY LENO, BILLY CRYSTAL, STEVE MARTIN, ROBIN WILLIAMS, BRAD GARRETT, WHOOPI GOLDBERG, AND MANY MORE.Who hasn't wished for the perfect withering comeback line, a clever tension-breaking quip, or a winning flirtatious remark? Being funny is hard work and not everyone is a natural. How to Be Funny is a witty guide that teaches readers precisely how to be funnier in everyday life. It's a must-read for anyone who has to speak in public, be engaging and funny at work or at play, or who hopes to one day go out on a date.

Jon Macks, a comedy writer for The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, the Academy Awards, the Emmy Awards, Hollywood Squares, and the nation's top comedians, politicians, and corporate leaders, knows his funny business. Here he demystifies the process of making people laugh, breaks down the basic building blocks and types of humor -- which include self-deprecation, misdirection, deadpan delivery, sarcasm, and "the reverse" -- and reveals the best approaches to use in common situations.

How to Be Funny features helpful (and hilarious) tips and anecdotes from the comic legends Mack's worked with -- including Jay Leno, Arsenio Hall, Gilbert Gottfried, Billy Crystal, Rita Rudner, Dave Barry, and Carrie Fisher -- in his eleven years as one of the nation's top television writers.

Whether the goal is to give a memorable public address or deliver a killer line with friends, How to Be Funny is a charming, instructive, and practical read.

How to Make People Laugh is a book that targets regular comedians, such as you and me. It does not try to transform you into a professional comedian. Instead, it puts comedy in the spotlight of everyday life.

With this book, you will learn techniques that you can easily incorporate at parties or even in regular banter with friends and colleagues.

How to Make People Laugh maintains its hold on wholesome family goodness. After all, you are trying to create not just a comedic persona but an overall persona. You want people to see you a certain way. Are you Hilarious Harry, Dad Joke Diego, Sarcastic Sharon, or Deadpan Dan? All of those are better than Offensive Oona, Dirty Joke Dean, and Literal Lisa.

This book will show you how to have a general sense of humor—or make full use of the one that you already have. After all, not all jokes are uproariously funny. Some can make you grin. Some can make you smile. So, if you start out making people smile, instead of making them laugh, you are on your way.

A straightforward, often humorous workbook approach to comedy writing as creative problem-solving. In it, veteran Hollywood comedy writer John Vorhaus offers his tools of the trade to writers, comics, and anyone else who wants to be funny. Among these indispensable tools are Clash of Context, Tension and Release, The Law of Comic Opposites, The Wildly Inappropriate Response, and The Myth of the Last Great Idea. Readers will learn that comedy = truth and pain (the essence of the comic situation), that fear is the biggest roadblock to comedy (kill the ferocious editor within and rich, useful comic ideas will flow), and much more.

Think quickly on your feet: be smooth, funny, and clever – all at once. Goodbye awkward silences, hello conversational agility! No matter where you lie on the spectrum of awkward to engaging, witty banter is always the end goal – and it should be. Witty banter, and all the steps that lead to it, allows you to (1) disarm and connect with anyone, (2) immediately exit boring small talk mode, and (3) instantly build rapport like you’re old friends. Flow with the conversational twists and turns like water. The Art of Witty Banter carefully examines the art, nuance, and mechanics of banter and charm to make you witty comeback machine, the likes of which your friends have never seen. You’ll be able to handle, defend, disarm, and engage others in a way that makes you comfortable and confident with each growing day.

Following a devestating break-up and the loss of his job, one man receives an unexpected surprise when he learns that he is next in line to join a society of super-villains that controls the planet.

Following a devestating break-up and the loss of his job, one man receives an unexpected surprise when he learns that he is next in line to join a society of super-villains that controls the planet.

Following a devestating break-up and the loss of his job, one man receives an unexpected surprise when he learns that he is next in line to join a society of super-villains that controls the planet.

Following a devestating break-up and the loss of his job, one man receives an unexpected surprise when he learns that he is next in line to join a society of super-villains that controls the planet.